Getting Perspective

When we are too busy - we miss the important things.

2010-08-09T12:38:00.001-07:00

Picture this – you just left the office at 7pm after a long hectic day to head home so you can do a few more hours of work before bed. You are driving along with a sea of other people on a freeway in a major city flowing along at 70mph. It feels productive, there is a lot of energy, things are happening so fast so you stay alert even though you feel very tired and burned out …. then all of a sudden you hear a pop then a thump thump thump and you feel your car jiggling. You realize you have a flat tire so you pull over on the shoulder. As your car coasts to a rest a list of todos from work and home floods your mind. You then feel the dread of having to work even later to make up for lost time. .. all because of this blasted tire… the worst timing ever.. Then you suddenly notice the woosh, woosh woosh of all the cars ripping past you at what feels like insanely dangerous speeds. You think to yourself – wow, I didn’t realize that I was going that fast. You can feel your car twitch repeatedly - as each one whizzes by it tries to suction your car back into the high speed flow of life. You sit for moment then take a deep breath and get the feeling that you just got a time out from the rat race. You are surprised that after all this time you didn’t realize how fast you were going and how busy you were until you stopped for a moment and noticed.

My work schedule had been increasingly busy over the last decade until March of 2009 when I got laid off. During several years prior to the layoff - I had convinced two organizations to hire me as their I.T. Director at the same time. I was managing two teams of people providing technology support as well as database and other technology projects for both organizations. I loved being so productive and efficient. I loved being challenged with the diversity of two different organizations. I prided myself in being a master multitasker. It wasn’t until I got laid off that I had fully realized the impact on myself, who I was and how it was affecting the people around me when I was very busy - which was most of the time. After the layoff I had a lot of extra time on my hands because I was now only working about 15 hours a week. As my life slowed down with this extra time - I started noticing things about myself that surprised me. I noticed I was much more patient with my wife and kids. I noticed more positive traits in my kids and took the time to enjoy them in the moment. I noticed I was a better listener. I noticed I was more engaged with people when they talked. I noticed more nonverbal things about people. I noticed more when people were in pain or hurting even when they didn’t tell me in words. I noticed I gave people more grace when they didn’t deliver on what they promised the first time. I noticed that I wasn’t worrying as much about little things getting done. I was in a completely different state of mind.

This layoff became an important realization for me. It was one of those God has my attention moments. It was a life lesson for me about the importance of moderating the pace of my life so I don’t compromise my ability to enjoy people, life, and things around me. I still love to be productive but now I realize that I need to keep a better balance. The challenge though is that I don’t know I am missing out unless I get some down time – every day. It really does sneak up on me. When we are busy we don’t realize we are missing out on life itself. That’s why I found that I need to just put it into my schedule and have a strict discipline to do it.

How do I do it personally you ask? For me I do it in 3 steps.

1. Free My Mind: I first find a quiet dark place to take away all the distractions. I find that I need to first empty what is occupying my mind at the time by writing it down. Otherwise the stresses of the day just pop in and take over. I’ve found that it helps to write these things down so I don’t worry about keeping track of htem. I’ve been doing this by journaling for 10 minutes about what is on my mind. Then I just have a notepad in case anything pops back into my head – I write it down then close my eyes again.

2. Listening: Then I focus on listening to myself and also anything that God might be trying to tell me. Sometimes I don’t hear anything. Sometimes I am reminded of someone that I need to encourage or apologize to. I also notice how I might be feeling i.e. sad, frustrated, devalued etc. I do this for another 15-30 minutes. It’s very hard in the beginning – especially if you are ADD like me. With practice you’ll get better, you’ll also start noticing important things. Things about people and relationships.

3. Contemplation: Another thing I like to do is contemplate. Just let you mind wander about the various interesting things in life. I find my best invention and creative ideas come at this time. This is a time to Get Perspective on myself, God’s creation and appreciate the people in my life!

Try it out and let me know if you find success!

Ted

Breaking out of the "Bubble"

2009-05-24T00:21:00.001-07:00

I just watched the movie "Slumdog Millionaire". I thought it was a great movie for so many reasons. It had such a great story and many other great attributes. I was mostly impacted by the severe conditions that he grew up in. I know that conditions like this exist for hundreds of million people all over the world but I forgot and this movie helped me remember. It's so important that I remember and continue to keep my self exposed and connected to the rest of the world to keep my perspective of reality in touch. Bill Hybels has a book called: "Holy Discontent: Fueling the Fire That Ignites Personal Vision". In this book he talks about keeping the fire going with the things that make us cry, sad, uncomfortable because it keeps our passion alive which is the fire that motivates us to do something about it.

I get excited about the power of film because it's one step away from being there. It tells a powerful story without ever leaving your house. It helps connect people to things they wouldn't otherwise see or experience, has the potential to change us, to make us better people, to do something big, to change the world. Every powerful tool like this can be used for evil or good and we have the choice to do either with it. To create a movie that inspires or just entertains.. to watch a movie that inspires, one that entertains, or one that desensitizes us to the reality around us to make us more apathetic then we were the day before.

These are our choices. Our choices make us who we are. Every choice takes us down a path that either brings us closer or further away from igniting our passions that have the potential to make a difference in someone's life. What will you choose today, tomorrow, and the next?

That's Interesting...

2009-05-06T11:08:00.001-07:00

My seven year old daughter was telling me how we need to be careful about the Swine Flu and that it has killed 3000 people in the United States. I explained to her that it hasn’t killed anyone in the U.S. as of yet and that it has only killed 30 people in Mexico. She insisted she was correct because a teacher at school told her so. I'm sure she missunderstood her teacher so I told her I would prove it and Googled it and read a news article that explained the details I just told her. She then looked confused as to why she heard something different at school. I then proceeded to explain to her that very often something new gets more news and attention than about other things that may be more important. I explained that the news media tries to keep people watching by dramatizing what would otherwise be a boring event. I told her that more people die in car accidents, the common cold etc. than the Swine Flu but those aren’t interesting so they don’t get the attention. I found a news article that summed up my thoughts comparing the seriousness of the Swine Flu compared to other diseases.

http://www.foreignpolicy.com/story/cms.php?story_id=4910

So, if we understand that the news only reports only new an interesting things to keep their audience and not on stories that are the most important, we can then conclude that we can’t rely on the news for an accurate representation for what is really going on in the world and what is the most important. A good portion of our society relies on the daily news to give them the information they need to stay on top of things but what I don’t think they realize is they are getting duped with what’s interesting verses what’s important. The Paris Hilton dramas in the news over the past few years proves my point entirely.

So, if the majority of our society is hooked to a daily feeding tube from the news that provides new and interesting things, and gets distracted from the really important things… what’s the impact? Well, we start living in a bubble of non-reality based on an illusion that someone else creates for us based on “what’s interesting”. The irony here is that our society is also hooked on “Reality Tv” but the truth of it is that behind the scenes is staged and not real at all.

You ever feel depressed after you watch the news? Well you probably are because 99% of what they report on is someone getting stabbed, beaten raped etc. etc. They report this because it’s more interesting than someone helping someone in need. They get better ratings on negative stuff that shocks us than the positive inspiring stories.

I wonder how the news affect the crime rate. I mean, if you see people committing crimes all the time does it cause us to not take crime so seriously and then be more likely to commit it? I was thinking the other day about the quantity of TV shows that are based on someone getting murdered. How many variations of CSI are there anyway? I lost count but shows like Medium, The Fringe, Monk, Psych etc. etc. all stay alive because someone dies in every episode.

So what’s the problem exactly? My opinion is that as a society we are addicted to news and shocking information so much so that we consume it multiple times a day. We hear about someone dying in the news on TV on the radio, come home from work and watch an episiode of Monk where someone is murdered and then read a Stephen King novel before bedtime.

What impact does this all this have on our outlook on life? Does it inspire us to do something to make a difference or just take the world less seriously and have another apathetic day.

I wonder what the morale would be of our country if the news was mostly inspiring stories. I wonder how many more people would get involved in helping the needy. I wonder if the crime rate would drop. I wonder if we would be more productive with our time. These are the things that are interesting to me. How about you?

The Most Beautiful Things Are Usually Free

2008-12-23T16:18:00.001-08:00

It occurred to me that the most beautiful things in life.... are
actually free - from our creator! This sunset was taken at Corona Del
Mar (about 20 minutes from my house). I forget to take advantage of
views like this because I am too busy! Busy doing what you ask? Not
sure actually but whatever it is it can't be so important that I miss
out on views like the one shown here...

New Years Resolutions... what's the big deal?

2008-01-05T14:05:00.000-08:00

What is the big deal about creating goals for this New Year anyway? People create goals because they want positive change in their lives. The old saying "fail to plan - plan to fail" rings true if you want to improve things but don't take initiative.

My goal this year is to create a blog site to provide content and ideas to help people regain lost perspectives about what is important in life. People everywhere consume the limited time they have left on earth without any perspective on what is really important. Once we lose perspective, we focus on the wrong things and treat people poorly and live selfishly. We are selfish people by nature and our actions, money, and time follow our perspective at that moment. If we were to proactively feed and manage our perspectives a positive stewardship of our available resources would quickly follow.

Here is an inspiring video about how everyday people can make a significant impact on others:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OY06iCwEP2Q

My hope is that we continually reset our perspectives and then get inspired to do something meaningful with the time and resources God has given us to impact others for eternal purposes.